Saturday's Just Got Better

I recently looked up more information on dental schools. At first I became very overwhelmed, as is often my response at looking up what it takes to be a dentist. But today I did something that will help to prepare me. My life is now on paper in a way it's never been recorded, nor lived.

What you see here is not AT ALL how I currently live, but it does contain in it exactly where I'd like to be; where I need to be. I read an article titled, "How Dental School Works" by a dentist named Dr. Jerry Gordon. One thing he mentioned is that dental school students, as well as college students desiring to be dentists, need to have schedules where they don't have any places where they could waste time; time needs to be the most precious commodity and to be treated as such. He then states, "In college, you may have four hours of lecture four days a week; take about 32 credit hours per year, and have three and a half months off during the summer. In dental school, you have nine hours of lecture and/or lab five days a week, take about 100 credit hours per year, and have only a couple of weeks off in the summer. In college, many students take a part time job. In dental school, that is next to impossible."

So, in an attempt to utalize the time I'm given in the most academically fruitful way, this is my experiment (it's ironic the amount of hours that went into creating this):

This may be way out of my grasp, but I'll never know unless I try. It looks busy to me, but maybe it really isn't so much. I've been advised by a dear friend and mentor to treat my school as a job, arrive in the morning and work for a minimum of 8 hours; there is always work that can be done. He fairly added, "after those hours go home, have fun, you're finished for the day".

As I feel this out, things will be rearranged as needed. In the mean time, if you pray, pray for me because I'll need it! If you don't pray, pray for me because I'll need it...

Fatherhood

I'm 25, and haven't seen my dad in 17 years. I've seen pictures, and we speak on occasion (once every few months, if that), but as for actual face-to-face interactions, I can't recall any. All that really exists are vague memories that are hazy and possibly influenced by media; I'm not completely sure if they really happened. It's sort of weird trying to put into words what my minds eye sees. Imagine someone yelling a message to you from across a busy warehouse. The clarity of their voice sort of get's manipulated by any surrounding objects and chatter. It sounds nothing like if they were right next to you calmly speaking. That's kind of what the motion pictures in my head are like. They literally look hazy with tons of information missing as if they've been tampered with, or altered by whatever may be surrounding the vicinity of the memory. When someone's yelling across a busy warehouse, you can't be too certain of the message you're receiving; similarly the memories I have aren't held onto too confidently because they aren't clear and crisp as a memory should be, they're more or less blurry ideas.
-Another good way to describe it would be to compare looking through a cleaned window (a clear memory to be sure of), verses looking through those thick glass block walls (clouded memory with uncertainty as to what's on the other side).

I put a picture I had of my dad, next to one I had of me. 

On the back was a location and a date.

Why is this my entry today? I have no idea. I just spoke with my dad, and then felt I should write. I don't know his story. I don't know his past and what led up to the events that have unfolded in each of our lives. I guess I just want to state it for all to read that I hold nothing against him. I have no hard feelings or regrets. I have no sadness. Sure, I wonder about things, and have questions, but they don't stem from an angry or sad place.
These thoughts aren't newly conceived thoughts at the prospect of becoming a father. I've been cognizant of everything I've just said since at least high school. Rather than the news of the pregnancy leading to these insights, these insights have lead to heightened excitement for our baby to come. I finally get to be the father I always wondered about. My dad's dad wasn't around for his upbringing either, and this is my opportunity to break a mold while gaining a greater understanding of fatherhood and what it means.


To sum this all up: I was determined not to serve a mission up through the age of 20. In that year, I received an impression that if I did serve a mission my wife would be happy, and my children would be happy. I did end up serving a mission and I learned gospel truths at a depth I'd never learn in any other way. I returned home and was married to the amazing Sarah Lundblad, and now she and I get to be parents together; I get to be a dad. 

Not my baby. This is me and my cousin, Kai. 

But it's an image I like.

(Again, not my baby!)

I am confident that the things in our lives are designed in such a way that we can grow from them.


I just got a text from my dad, "We can make that happen. I look forward to that." I told him I thought we should meet up over Christmas break so he can see his grand-baby.


"There is nothing ugly; I never saw an ugly thing in my life: for let the form of an object be what it may, - light, shade, and perspective will always make it beautiful" -John Constable

The Complexities of Marriage

One of my friends that I grew up with, Clint Thurber, got to spend some time out here at BYU-H before finishing his degree in Provo. When we talked about Hawaii, he told me of a friend he still had out here that I should look up, Jacob Hansen. Understand that when you're married, making friends is a little more complex than it has ever been before. Clint knew I would click with Jake and I trusted we would, but Jake and I are each married and that adds to the equation. 

When you're single, you, by yourself, decide whether or not you like the other person, and that's that. You either do, and you stay friends, or you don't and you part ways. But think of a marriage, especially if you are married to someone not exactly like you. The two of you may like different things and may prefer different company and that's perfectly fine; healthy even. In the "friend-making-department" of a marriage though, is where the complexity comes in; not only do you have to like the person and the spouse, but so does your own spouse have to like each of them. Let's say you both click with one of the people. That doesn't even matter unless both of you like both of them. Complex yet? Well it get's worse. Sarah and I meet another couple where we both like both of the spouses, that's great, we're done right? Friends? No, not yet. What if they don't like us? That's a deal breaker. I have to like him, I have to like her, Sarah has to like him, Sarah has to like her, he has to like me, he has to like Sarah, she has to like me, she has to like Sarah. This is a total of 8 mutual feelings! 8! When you're single, it's only 2! Making friends is 4X more complex when you're married. These are the types of things meant when people say "marriage is hard". Somehow with the Hansen's it just worked out. We both loved both of them, and it was mutual. 8 mutual feelings! Success!

I don't remember who called who or what we first did together, but today the Hansen's and the Zimmerman's have many awesome memories together and we're sad to see them go, but very happy for them and their next phase of life. Jake did some work out here for a vacation rental company and in his words, "the pay wasn't great, but the benefits made up for it" or something to that effect. The following pictures are the Hansen's farewell party at a multi-million dollar vacation home on the North Shore, near Shark's Cove. In great company with Jake's brother, Ian, Jake and Erica, Shane and Ashley Harder, and Cade and Kaycee Romeril whom we've been introduced to several times but haven't yet gotten much opportunity to get to know, though we hope to.

Sarah and Erica munching in the kitchen.

The front door is at the end of that hallway, kitchen to the left. I'm standing in the opening of $10,000 doors.

Indoor dining to the right, patio through doors. Lava rock and ocean behind bushes.

Amazing painting of Chinaman's Hat by dining room table.

Jake and brother, Ian. Balcony outside master bedroom.

Setting sun behind the house.

Back of the house. Lava rock and beach behind me.

I live where the most beautiful postcards start, and rainbows end.

Ian Hansen, Shane and Ashley Harder, Sar and I, Jacob and Erica Hansen, and Cade and Kaycee Romeril.

Bacon cheese burgers, chips, various Hawaiian beverages.

Jake and Erica, Sar and I love you and will miss you. Go forth and make babies!

More Of Our Story

Who doesn't believe in evolution? According to baby center, our baby has been all of the following: a blueberry, a kidney bean, a grape, a kumquat (had to look that one up), a fig, a lime, a shrimp, and now we're at a lemon for a baby.
We're officially in the 2nd trimester, at 14 weeks, and Sarah started the day out getting sick on her way to work. I found out via text. That's one impressive mama-to-be right there; driving down the highway getting sick and then texting about it. I responded that I was sorry, but rather impressed at her accomplishment. This should be subsiding soon.
This week's baby development:
-Baby can squint, frown and grimace, amongst other facial expressions, as he/she is being surrounded by the amniotic fluid into which he or she is now able to piddle in. It's now also possible for baby to grasp and suck its thumb. You pee your little kidney's out, baby!
My school and Sarah's school:
I'm taking 12 credits all of summer, divided by a summer break. Right now I have Analytical Trigonometry, and the 1st half of analytical Biochemistry. After the break I'll have a New Testament class, Politics & Education, and the 2nd half of Biochemistry.
Sarah only has 31 days left! Woa! I just realized. I wonder if she knows. You got this, Sar. You just keep pressing on, and give that baby of ours a healthy and happy place to pee. You have no idea how much I appreciate you and all that you do for our growing family. I give you thanks from the sincerest portion of my heart. I could never do this without you.

This is our 1st ultrasound, taken at about 9 weeks, I think. It won't mean much to anyone else, but to us this is our gummy-bear baby. 

Sarah and I met in 2004 while lifeguarding, but it all officially started in 2006

Triple date with my 2 best mates, Brendan and Holland. Look at my sexy wife. Now stop looking. We all decided to take cheesy prom pictures. We told the girls to look their best. We then took them to Kroger and had them pick out food they wanted. We brought it all back to Uncle B's house and cooked dinner together followed by a movie. This wasn't our first date, but it was one of the earliest.

Weekend Adventures

This was a weekend of firsts for the Zimmerman's. We've now been on Oahu for just under 9 months, and there is still so much we haven't done. We finally got to check off two of those things this week(end): The Polynesian Cultural Center (PCC), and Shark's Cove.

I got an e-mail saying that the night show, "Ha-Breath Of Life", was going to be free for faculty, staff, and students. It was being filmed that night, so I'm sure it was to fill the seats. We got there early and spent some time wondering about the grounds. 

This guy was about to show how to crack coconuts open with a rock.

 River rides.

Moai Statues of Rapa Nui (Easter Island).

 The stage for the night show. I learned that there are easily over 100 dancers that perform basically every night. The same performers do this time after time with such happy expressions, never seeming to tire of the routine.

 My smokin' hot date and I.

After the show Sarah started balling like a babbling brook. Once a month she has a good cry, and it's usually very random and quite hilarious (she admits so herself). I, not being too sensitive in that moment (I'm sorry, Sarah) saw my religion teacher, Elder Olson, and insisted we go say hello. She could not pull herself together and stood there crying as we spoke with them.

This is my baby mama, 14 weeks pregnant, in Shark's Cove.

After Shark's Cove we were to be showering off to then meet back up with Jake and Erica Hansen for the rest of the evening since they leave Wednesday. Sarah got to poking around on Craigslist and found a brown crib/diaper changer she'd been dreaming of, only 7 minutes away. We got there and ended up leaving with a car-seat and matching stroller as well. All of this was very affordable (Chicco brand, like new, for 20% of the retail value). This new bundle now crowding our only walkway was a huge blessing, and now an adventure as we find room for it. 

Baby stuff is to Sarah, as motorcycle is to Zach.

DAT Practice and Shooting Stars

I laid around for a while today and my poor neighbors had to hear me coughing and clearing my throat all morning. But eventually I got up and moving and did some DAT practice.

Aside from knowledge of the sciences, these are a few of the perceptual abilities an aspiring dentist needs to acquire:

Where the holes will be if ever hole-punching folded paper

 The shapes that take place when folding paper

Differentiating between angles and ordering smallest to greatest

Visualizing different sides of an object

Knowing how to put shapes through holes (child's play?)

Those were all my strong(er) suit, got 71 out of 90 for a score of 20 on that portion of the DAT

Natural Sciences however... notice all that red. It's a good thing I've got a year to study.

Tonight Sarah and I have a date night! Free night show at the PCC, and we've never been!
Speaking of Sarah, and I'll end with this, she's at it again with her quirky refrigerator habits...

I understand "waste not, want not" but really? When I questioned her about when she planned on finishing this, she just started laughing, then hid her face.

Post Finals

What should I be doing when I'm sick? Sarah and my doctor have similar opinions that differ from that of friends of mine out here. Today I got a text that read, "Spear fishing", from a friend of mine. Not a question. Not an answer to a question. Not even a complete sentence with punctuation. Could have been a suggestion, or even a demand. But there was one certainty: it was an excuse for me to get out of the house. And that I did. Matt Roberts, and David Stephen and I went out to Bikini Beach to hunt like men. And like men we did hunt. And like hunting men with little experience spearfishing, we came back empty handed. And like men coming back empty handed we lied about the fish that barely got away. Only kidding about the lying part, but really, I almost got one...
Even when coming back empty handed it's such an awesome experience. It requires such focus for me to relax in that environment, and I think that's part of the appeal. I find that my jaw is clinched and takes much effort to lessen the bite, trusting that water won't rush through the snorkel. It's tempting to just kick as hard as I can to maintain a position in the moving current; to maintain control. When I want to just settle and let the tide hold me for a bit. It's so soothing when I can just chill for a second and hear my breathing, and know that I'm managing my nerves in, what seems to be, an unmanageable environment. Not to mention the fact that it can be done while I'm envisioning how a shark attack might go down.
Now, back to what should I be doing? This is the perfect opportunity to catch up on some reading.


When I'd rather be reading these... (part of Sarah's teaching paraphernalia)

It's about time I start practicing and applying the material covered in this...

It's kind of got pictures too, but they're a bit different. Things more pertaining to Organic Chemistry, Gen. Chemistry, Biology, and Perceptual Ability. And not so much about Naughty Kitten, Twinkle The Tooth Fairy, or Little Donkey Learns To Help; just a few of the titles in Sarah's collection.

So that's where I stand today: I'm sick, and I want to use this time to study up a bit on the DAT I'll have to take soon enough (not until next year).

In pregnancy news: Sarah is 13 weeks along and our baby is the size of a shrimp. She's still queasy. Hasn't had any crazy cravings. Certain smells don't seem to drive her crazy. She does say her "skin is different" meaning she definitely doesn't like being touched a whole lot right now.

Biology and Babies

It's Friday the 13th and the most haunting thing about this day already came and went. I had my Bio final at 7:00 AM, and unless I'm due for a miracle in the form of a D- (because that would be a miracle), it won't be the last Molecular Biology final I have to take.
I'm pretty down and out about it, but I'm hanging in there alright. I guess the biggest thing is that it's deserved. So it's a bit of shame I'm feeling. Undeserved hardships are tough to work though, but the deserved ones are the worst. Being able to recall all the ways it could have been avoided just kills.
Whatever the outcome, I do still have something worth celebrating.
Yesterday was quite the day. I got up at 7:45 to begin studying for the bio test. I basically studied through to 3:00 when I realized I needed to start figuring out how to meet Sarah and her grandma in Waikiki for dinner. Long story short: I missed a bus, caught the next one, rode 2 hours, walked a bit, made it by 6:00 for dinner. Dinner was awesome! Sarah, grandma, grandma's caretaker Rudy, Rudy's partner, Paul, Rudy's nephew, Eric, and Eric's girlfriend, Margarita. And our japanese waiter who ran everywhere he went and wouldn't let our waters drop below 2 inches from the top of the glass rim. Once dinner wrapped up and we were parting ways, Sarah, with the heaviest eyes I'd seen on her in a long time, offered to drive halfway so that I could study in the car. At one point she even said "Doesn't this remind you of high school and college driving home after late nights with friends?", to which I replied "...except now it's not even 10:00PM and we're worn out". Oh, marriage party hours. Once reaching our halfway point she pulled over and I drove while she laid in the passenger seat, asleep, with a towel for a blanket for the next 30 minutes.
I guess what I'm getting at is, despite my bio class, I feel successful; I feel I'm doing the things I should be in this life (with plenty of room to improve of course). My wife and I love each other and we've got a little bundle of joy, and poo, on the way.


                            Oh, here's our pregnancy test and the brief story: 

Sarah- "let's buy a test"
Me- "we don't need to, they're like 10 bucks, we'll eventually know if you're pregnant" 
Sarah- "c'mon, please???" 
Me- "how late are you?"
Sarah- "I don't know. A couple days?"
Me- "...a couple days? ...Really? That's it? [realized she was determined] Do what you gotta do" 
We bought it, she was right, we were in doubt.

The Blog Worked Today

Today: Wednesday, 4:30 PM, 78 degrees, partly cloudy, windy, 2nd to last day of the semester. I woke up around 7:45 and had 2 bowls of knock-off cocoa puffs for breakfast then headed to campus to study. I had my 3rd final today: Chemistry. It covered this semester and last semester and I'll probably find out this evening how I did. Only one more final to go until the semester is over and I, like every other student on the planet, am very ready for a break.
So, here's how the blog worked for me today. I got home from my final and thought to myself, "I'm done", and proceeded to watch an episode of New Girl. Then I remembered there is more I should be doing. My friend, Matt, has a blog dedicated to his wife and the idea is that each day he'll do something specifically for her to show his appreciation and love toward her (if she's the most important thing to him on this planet, he decided to start acting like it), then he'll blog about it. He had a "before and after" series of tidying up their place for her. So, I got off the bed and did the same! Thanks, Matt!


                                                 BEFORE

As I mentioned in a previous posting, we really do love to sleep with laundry, I wasn't kidding. We're often too lazy to put it away, and it's nice to have the lumps on the bed to manipulate for comfort. Though, we sometimes lose some items behind the bed or in the sheets, so it was thrown onto the floor. The sheet is also a recurring event. The dang corners just don't stay, so we'll sleep several nights with it all jumbled up and we now just see it as an extra blanket or cuddle item.
Welp, today I cleaned up...
                                                  AFTER

This place is what we refer to as our "box". When we're super stressed or grumpy we'll exclaim "I just need to get outta' this box!" Behind the refrigerator is a counter and sink with some cabinets and a tiny bathroom. Even with the small amount you can see beyond the fridge, the back wall is almost exposed; there really isn't much to this place, but it's home.


The point of all this is that there's always something we should be doing. The place needed cleaning, and today the idea of writing about it got me motivated enough to make it happen. Along with the fact that there is always something to be doing, I believe also a time for rest is unavoidable. Hope this helps someone get up and moving. I'm excited for Sarah to come home and have a clean place welcoming her! I love you, Sarah.


Now... off to study Biology. That guaranteed, unavoidable, time for rest is just around the corner!

What's In A Name?

"Doing What I Should"
Upon the discovery of becoming a father I've done a lot of thinking and I came up with this : I need to be better.
In my last posting I mentioned that this blog could serve as a means of making me a better person, and I should expound. I recently read an article of a friend (Tucker Garrett) who wrote about prioritizing. He said all the things I already knew, but said some things in a way I hadn't yet heard. He said that people often wish they could change their priorities, and he corrected that claim. He stated that people are prioritizing perfectly; they're doing exactly the thing they want to be doing. If they say they want to be adventurous, but they spend their time in-doors, than in that moment they are doing exactly what they want to be doing.
I have a lot of things that I say I want to be doing, but do my actions show it? Now, this isn't me wanting to be a blogger, and now finally living that out. This blog will be a means of increasing efficiency while online. An online blog brings with it one really big obvious risk: people are going to know my thoughts and actions and this can be held against me. I want to record this information in a place where anyone can view it. By doing this, I'm more accountable for "doing what I should". Along with that, I have a great desire to help people and influence them. I have 2 hopes :
1) I will influence others for good
2) I will become a better husband, father-to-be, and friend.


Now, to tie in something eternally important. I have had friends confront me with, "in the Mormon faith do you believe your works save you?" The answer is no. The good that I do is not what will get me to heaven. That is only achieved through Christ's death on the cross. But why wouldn't I just want to be better regardless? So, that's why I do it. My desire to be good is not to impress God or to earn grace; his love is unconditional. I want to be better to be an example of what I believe is important in life. Just believing it isn't enough, it's important to live the principles we believe are right, especially if others can benefit through it, because inevitably they will.

Rain, Laundry, and Heavy Eyelids

It's at that hour where it's as late as it is early; it's late as far as when I should have been asleep, and it's early as far as a new day is concerned. It's raining outside, we have clean laundry at the feet of our bed (we love to sleep with fresh laundry), and my eyelids are the heaviest they've been in a long time.
WE'RE PREGNANT! Was that subtle enough? We've known since about 5 weeks and are now broadcasting it. The estimated due date is October 22, 2012, and it's as firm an estimate can be. We have now had our first ultrasound and sport our gummy bear baby picture on our refrigerator, and we've gotten to hear the heartbeat twice: 160 beats/minute.
More on the creation of a blog, and the pregnancy (discovery) later. Suffice it to say the blog is something that I think can make me a better person.